Shout out to my boy Zach.
That being said, I'm sitting behind the merch table at a show in Portage, Indiana and I'm really hoping to slang some tshirts tonight. What better way to spend your hard-earned money than on a great new t-shirt? We even have some t-shirts with squirrels on them. Or maybe its a chipmunk. Whatever. Either way, I figure I spend about 500 bucks a year on t-shirts. Definitely a worthwhile investment.
We played a show in Toledo last night, and it was a surprisingly great show despite the fact that we did not go on until after midnight. Toledo is definitely the city that never sleeps. I had a Pabst Blue Ribbon on stage, which made me feel really cool. After we played, I also had a Bud Light, so I'm going to consider that a successful "mix". When it was finally time to leave, we played the "who's alright to drive?" game. I decided it was me, so I slipped into the driver's seat for our 5 miles drive to the Comfort Inn (the floor there is PURE COMFORT). We missed our turn, and I decided to make a left turn where there was a No Left Turn sign, mainly because it was close to 3 AM. Big mistake. Sirens and lights are behind us, and I instantly think back to my Pabst Blue Ribbon and Bud Light in regret.
I pull over, and the officer steps up to the window shining his light of heaven directly into my eyes, which I'm sure were beat red as they always are after we finish playing and they've been doused with sweat. As I fumbled through my wallet for my license, the conversation went something like this...
Officer Lovely: Do you know why I pulled you over?
Me: Uhhhh...was I not supposed to turn left back there?
Officer Lovely: Do you think you can turn left even when a sign says you can't?
Me: Well, I saw there were times under the sign and I wasn't sure...
Officer Lovely: Do you think you're special and you can make left turns even when there's a sign that says you can't?
Me: No, I mean, I just thought...
Officer Lovely: You have Pennsylvania plates, what brings you out this way?
Me: We're in a band and we just played at Frankie's.
Officer Lovely: Well I see your career is really taking off. Have a nice day.
He let us go, out of sympathy for our music careers. I knew that we were doing this for a reason! Another perfect example of being above the law for being so famous. Hell yeah.
Needless to say, I really like this guy...